Crazy!

I decided to go for my follow up scan at the EPU after all, just felt it would be confirmation of what we'd been told on Friday and would wrap things up....

I was very upfront about the fact I'd had a private scan a few days before and it didn't seem to be a problem, the ultrasound tech was lovely, interested in the surrogacy set up and that kept the conversation flowing. She saw the healthy baby and showed me the heartbeat flickering away and said all looked fine.

Then she moved to the other sac and said that she could see a yolk sac - which was interesting because the tech on Friday said she couldn't. She also commented that 'it' was curled up close the wall and so that made seeing anything difficult but she didn't see any heart activity. She didn't say whether she saw an embryo or not.

As is usual, I had to wait for their report to be typed up and then I was seen by a doctor. Straight away I told her that we knew we'd lost the twin as there was no heartbeat and she looked surprised, almost as if to say that she didn't know that or agree with it. And then she said that she didn't feel comfortable saying we had definitely lost the twin as it was still very very early and things can change. It seems that there has been some growth of the gestational sac since my last scan, although it is still behind the living embryo. In her opinion, we should have another scan to see if there is any more growth in a week's time so that's what we're booked in for! Honestly, what a roller coaster, only 6 odd weeks and we are getting a true run for our money.

If I'm honest, I can't see how the outcome with change but I'm still hopeful none the less and my IPs are feeling pretty much the same, optimistic but realistic. I of course Googled and there's lots of info out there about others who've had the same scan results as us and there was a positive outcome and so there is still a chance but we'll stay grounded until we have something tangible to get excited about, on the score of the twin. Regardless, we are still very much thrilled with having one beating baby and nothing can detract from the excitement that that news has brought!

I'm feeling well, extreme tiredness has hit this past few days but it's been a heatwave here in the UK so that could at least part explain that, it's too hot to get any decent rest and I'm also trying to juggle a house move too which doesn't help things - my mind is constantly whirring.

So, please say a little something for us, that perhaps a miracle could happen and in a week, twin b has caught up and showing us some signs of life and I'll post after the scan with the verdict.