Scared

Woke up to light red blood this morning and instantly felt pissed off. Why is this happening? Ha, that is the impossible question to answer.

We spoke to the EPU who said that unless there was a significant change in amount etc then there is nothing further they can do, which we understand. From their point of view, the scan yesterday was perfect.

IF spoke to the clinic for advice and the nurse didn't seem at all concerned but said to use an extra pessary and an extra estrogen tablet a day. She also said I should use the pessaries vaginally and so I have switched back. We wonder if the discharge has always been red but using the pessaries vaginally, until yesterday, was diluting the blood colour as the wax of the meds comes back out after a while and would mix with any bleeding.

I think it is one of those things, it will rumble on through the whole 12 weeks and we either learn to accept it and chill out or we will drive ourselves completely crazy. After all, worrying will solve nothing anyway.

Speaking to others for some reassurance, they confirmed what I already knew about it being more common to bleed with a gs pregnancy than not. A quick search of Google shows that almost all ladies in my situation experience bleeding and pain but it is so hard to quantify - how much did they bleed? Was it more or less than what I am experiencing? Questions that there is no simple or single one-size-fits-all answer for.

So, we remain optimistic since we have nothing else to tell us otherwise and keep everything crossed. I will be glad when I can leave these meds behind completely but that is still another 7 weeks away and that seems a scarily long way off yet.

IPs have been great, so supportive but they are also realistic and should the worst happen, I believe they are prepared and there will be no hysteria and no blame placed at my feet. I can't fault them, I have lucked out with this match.

I keep telling myself I have an excellent fertility track record - 4 pregnancies, 4 babies and number 5 will be no different. Everything has been too perfect for it not to work out this time too.

Positive thinking!!